lsd rambles.

im looking at the city, 4 huge windows all connected, on the top floor i breathe in, smiling but i realize.... there are so many buildings compared to the trees... we tore up what was once supposed to be. or did we just alter it? did we change it for the better? really? how could we not help but build houses and stores? how could we not help tearing shit own to bring shit up? how could we ever begin to comprehend what we mean to this world? what is my siginifcance? what is yours? how many people are smiling right now? crying right now? laughing right now? through every moment in life you gotta keep looking up and being positive.. because i see now.. im not alone. youre not alone ever... ever... you have the world. minds and cities to explore trees and mountains.. skies with your own eyes... so much to expierience... to look into someones eyes and feel something.. to make people laugh.. to make people see the simplicies of life.. help people see WHAT REALLY MAKES YOU HAPPY. i believe it is important to try to understand those around me... dig deep into who they are not who they project. so many thing s to think and reclude and recaculate.... WHO WE ARE, WHAT WE STAND FOR, WHAT WE BELIEVE IN. OUR INSECURIES. OUR SUCURITIES. am i a good person? are you? what is really a good person ? someone who conforms to all the laws..? most certainly not.. of course i believe there must be order.. but.. what is freedom for? shouldnt freedom always have good intentions.. to be free is not to destory things and do whatever the fuck you feel like.. to be free is to love yourself.. and be able to love others.. to get lost in lifes wonders and explore the world.. however you choose to do it.. be it in books or the internet.. DIG EXPLORE LEARN CHANGE keep on changing yourself for better... im thinking this might be a letter to me.. but its alo a letter to everyone who chooses to read it and understand it.... i must come back to this in a sober state and fix it but i cant stop rambling and typing about how i feel and what imthinking.. but i miss my friends.. they are sitting by the window and i lit a chocolate candle and as it burn i feel the smell soothe me. isnt that beautiful? a smell can calm ones mind? a sound can change ones persepctive? word can comclude so much and silence concludes so much more.

i fucking love life though.

i cant wait to live it tomarrow.

and the next day.

i cant wait ti turn the next page.

and embrace my current age.

i am young but im not that young, and so far this book is gunna sell.

keys in the ignition, and my mind wired from coffee and problems.
i drove, i rode along all the curves of the road, not really there.
of couse i was paying attention to the fact that i was driving, but
my mind wasnt really there. my thoughts kept slipping and with
every turn of the wheel at after curve i felt my mind drifting.
I stopped at a deli and purchased a pack of cigarettes and some juice.
i retured to my car and turned the volume up. maybe the music
would make my mind go numb with ease.. this time it didnt work..
the music began encouraging the very thoughts i was trying to avoid.
i changed the song, same result, next song, same result, next song..
NOW THATS WHAT IM TALKIN ABOUT!!!! i felt my troubles slip
right out my drivers seat window and i felt a smile creep up my cheeks.
no more feeling sorry for myself, i mean everyone get fucked over right?